Due to the Kavanaugh hearings and the Me Too movement, the President is claiming that boys are at risk. He is claiming a girl can accuse a boy of sexual assault and ruin his life.
The facts are wrong. Girls are not putting boys at risk. Society puts boys at risk with the attitude “Boys will be boys.” Boys are taught they need to drink and have sex to be men. I have teenage boys in my office all the time that are afraid that people will find out they are a virgin. They claim the other guys will look at them as weak if they find out they are a virgin at 16 years old.
I also hear many boys say they were drinking or using marijuana with their friends because they were afraid that if they refused to drink or smoke they other guys would think they are weak.
Our society tells adolescent boys that to be considered men they must have sex and drink. If they don’t engage in these behaviors, they are weak and pathetic.
Think back to when you were in high school. The cool guys had girlfriends, having sex and partying on the weekends. They were considered men and normal. The guy who didn’t have a girlfriend and was not having sex or partying was considered weak and a nerd.
This attitudes also impacted girls too. The girls who were having sex were considered easy and no one had respect for them. These were the girls guys would ask out if they wanted to have sex. Why would it be acceptable for a teenage boy to be sexually active but not a teenage girl? But this is what we were taught growing up and teenagers are still taught today.
We need to change the stereotype society has about how men act and women act. Watch the trailer to “The Mask you Live IN” and see what society teaches boys about being a man. We need to change the belief “Boys will be boys” and teach boys to respect others and themselves. The part about respecting themselves is very important. Many teenage boys turn to drugs or try to commit suicide because they cannot live with the pressure of conforming to this old, outdated stereotype.
Please watch this trailer and think about a teenage boy who is 15 years old and still trying to figure life out, should we subject him to this type of social pressure? https://youtu.be/hc45-ptHMxo
Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 20 years experience treating teenagers. He is a founding member of the National Advisory Board for the Alive and Free Program which participated in The Mask You Live In. For more information regarding Dr. Rubino’s work and private practice visit his website http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.