Re-evaluating Teenagers Gaming and Texting in the 21st Century

Most middle school and high school students have grown up with smart phones and computers for gaming and texting their friends. The fact that they have grown up with technology being part of their daily lives is an important fact we need to remember. However, there are also parents concerns about how much time their children are spending online. Parents worry about if this is healthy for their childrens physical and emotional development. Additionally, this brings up the common argument about how much time teens are spending on line. Many parents have concerns that their teenager is addicted to their smart phones and gaming. Teenagers feel that their parents are over reacting and they can’t become addicted to their devices. Teenagers also feel that their parents do not understand that they have grown up with technology and texting is the way teenagers communicate in the 21st century.

Due to the Coronavirus, gaming is being examined very closely. During quarantine and since the pandemic has started gaming and texting have become the primary way teenagers have remained in contact with each other. Furthermore, gaming and texting are the safest way for teenagers to remain in contact with each other during the pandemic and until we have the coronavirus under control. Think about it, places such as movie theaters and malls were closed for awhile and some are just now partially reopening. Therefore, gamine continues to provide a safe way to hang out with friends. This is very important to teenagers social development at their age. Additionally, research is showing that teenagers who have little access to normal social activities are becoming depressed and anxious during the pandemic (CDC). Therefore, we need to re-evaluate the issue of gaming during the pandemic.

Now the truth is teenagers can become addicted to their computer devices and gaming. The World Health Organization (WHO) took a step this year and classified “Gaming Disorder” as a formal diagnosis. As I stated, many parents have been concerned about this for years. Also it does not just impact teenagers, as many may think. I have had couples come in for marriage counseling because Gaming was destroying a marriage. For several years the American Psychological Association has said it would be adding Gaming addiction as a formal diagnosis to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, however, so far the APA has not been able to decide on the specific criteria for this diagnosis. What the WHO has done is they have acknowledged what many parents have been reporting for years and helping us to take a step so it is acknowledged as a diagnosis. While it is a diagnosis according to the WHO, gaming again is one of the safe activities teenagers can engage in during the pandemic. This does create a difficult situation.

The United States appears to be behind other countries in identifying that video game addiction does exist and does create problems for individuals and families. Seoul, South Korea and Tokyo, Japan have inpatient treatment centers for gaming addiction. These rehabilitation centers have been open for years and have treated thousands of people over the years. Therefore, other countries have acknowledged Gaming addiction. However, parents in the United States parents are still worrying about it and debating the issue because the United States does not acknowledge the diagnosis yet.

As a psychotherapist who treats teenagers, I would have to agree with the parents and I say Gaming addiction is real. I have seen teenagers become violent, punching holes in walls or physically threatening their parents, if there video games or cellphones are taken away as a punishment. Teenagers have told me they cannot function without their video games or cellphones and will do anything to get them back. This sounds like and looks like a problem to me. A cellphone or PlayStation should not be a teenager’s life line.

However, as I stated above, the pandemic does create a different situation regarding teenagers gaming online with friends. Since this is a safe way for teenagers to maintain social contacts, I think we need to create new guidelines for the pandemic. Parents are aware that teenagers can become addicted, but they can monitor how their teenagers are acting before and after using electronics. Additionally, we do need to remember that teenagers today have grown up with electronics as part of their daily lives since they were infants. They have a very different experience and relationship with technology and gaming than adults do. Most adults started using cellphones and gaming in their 20s. Therefore, the way teenagers experience technology today is most likely very different than how their parents relate to it. We need to consider this fact when we establish rules for how teenagers can use texting and gaming. We also need more research examining this issue.

The statement from the WHO states that the Gaming must be interfering with activities of daily life, such as homework, and be present for at least a year. These guidelines seem sensible to me. Also the WHO cautions that issues such as depression and anxiety need to be ruled out before assigning the diagnosis of Gaming Addiction. Many teenagers who are depressed or dealing with severe anxiety do self-medicate with video games. Finally, the WHO states your child needs to be evaluated by a mental health clinician who specializes in treating and assessing children and teenagers. This is very important because typically children and teenagers do not always have the typical symptoms we associate with depression or anxiety. A clinician experienced in assessing children and teenagers can make the appropriate diagnosis. Given these guidelines it appears to me that parents can allow teenagers to use their electronics more during this time of the pandemic. Parents can make sure to balance electronic time with other activities such as exercise. Furthermore, parents need to be observing their teenagers mood on a daily basis. If the teen is looking depressed or acting anxious then the parents need to schedule a time to have their teenager evaluated by a mental health professional who specializes in treating children and teenagers.

I have included a link to a segment on Good Morning America which discusses the diagnosis and other issues I have discussed to assist you in understanding what the WHO is referring to with Gaming Addiction, https://youtu.be/axG1tLdutmY.

The World Health Organization has taken an important step in helping us understand and define a problem many parents have been reporting for years. This is not a bad thing. I view it as a positive step. Technology is moving very fast. In fact, it is moving so fast we cannot keep up with all the new issues we need to deal with as a result of new technology. The more we understand this technology the more we all can benefit and avoid potential serious problems.

With that be stated, the Coronavirus pandemic does present parents and teenagers with a entirely new set of issues. The pandemic points out the different relationship teenagers have with technology because it has been part of their lives since they were born. Therefore, we need to pay attention to this fact and do more research examining how growing up with technology differs from having technology introduced to your life during college. We may find some very unique findings which may change how we look at technology and our expectations for teenagers.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating and assessing children, teenagers and trauma victims. For more information about his work visit his website www.RubinoCounseling.com or Facebook page www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Parents What Teenagers are Wanting from You

Many parents ask me what their teenagers are looking for from them. Teenagers want to know that they are loved, you hear them and see them for who they really are as a person. These statements can help your teenagers. Try it and sees what happens.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating children, teenagers and trauma victims. For more information about his work visit his website at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page at http://www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3

Having A Fun, Calm Halloween

Halloween is next weekend and many children are anxiously counting the days until Halloween. For children this is a great holiday. They get to wear a costume they like and they get free candy. What more could a child ask for? Many children plan all year about the costume they are going to wear. Many children have very elaborate costumes and they are very proud of their costume and they have a lot of fun being someone else for the day.

Since most children have been planning for Halloween for months and at school they often have Halloween activities and sometimes Halloween parties, it should not be a surprise that they are full of energy and usually hyper on Halloween. For some parents, this can create a problem especially when you have more than one hyper child to contend with on Halloween. Additionally, since children are so hyper on Halloween and expecting a lot, it is not surprising that children can have melt downs very easily in addition to being very excited. This can set up a situation where Halloween can easily fall a part. If parents have had a hard day or week at work, the last thing they are looking forward to is a house full of children bouncing off the walls who can’t understand why their parents are not excited too.

In order to avoid a chaotic Halloween it is helpful to establish a family plan for the day. A plan that you have also discussed with the children and everyone agrees to follow. By having a family plan you can help avoid melt downs and if one does occur you are in a better position to deal with it.

The first thing to do is to have a family meeting regarding costumes. Discuss what your children want to be and make sure it’s appropriate for their age and for the weather you typically have for Halloween. Additionally, you may need to look at how much your child wants to spend on their costumes. Once you and your child have agreed upon an appropriate costume that they like, you are ready for the next step.

The next thing you need to look at is what day of the week is Halloween. For example, this year Halloween is on Sunday. Therefore, children have school the next day and this needs to be part of the family’s plans for Halloween. Additionally, parents need to decide if they are comfortable with their children trick or treating in their neighborhood or just at houses with people the family has as friends. Maybe you are not comfortable with trick or treating and your city, church or friends may be hosting a Halloween party and you are planning on attending a party. Some families also plan to have a special Halloween dinner and watching Halloween movies at home. Once parents have decided what they feel is the best option for their family, the parents can explain their decision to their children. During this time, parents can address any objections children may have and discuss the issues and feelings until you have an agreement.

The finally step is to have a plan in place for melt downs. The day before Halloween and the day of Halloween make sure your children were able to get a good nights sleep and have had breakfast, lunch and dinner and not too much candy. This will help your children to be able to control their emotions easier and make it easier for them to pay attention. If there is a melt down, a time out usually is the best option. If you are at a party, try to find a quiet place you can sit with your child while they get themselves together. If they are unable to get themselves together or the melt downs keep happening then it’s time to call it a night and let them go to bed. Try to frame it as they are going to bed because they need more sleep and not as a punishment. This may make it easier if you have to call it a night. Also before Halloween go over your expectations and what you consider a meltdown and any other behavior that may trigger a time out. It’s very important that everyone has the same understanding about the rules. This increases the odds that everyone will follow the rules and if they don’t, everyone will understand what is going to happen.

Putting together a plan increases your chances of everyone has a fun Halloween. However, most children are very excited about Halloween and are more hyper than usual. Therefore, take these factors into account when you are dealing with your children. Their behavior may not be what you expected, but if it’s not causing problems it’s best to overlook it. Remember, children have been attending school remotely for over a year with very little contact with their friends. Therefore, they are more likely to be a little more excited this year. Happy Halloween.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating children, teenagers and trauma victims including first responders. For more information about his work visit his website at www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page at www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3 or his podcasts on Spotify or Apple.

Laws about Sexual Behavior Teens Need to Know

The pandemic has left many teenagers feeling bored, anxious and depressed. While most of the Country is opening up and teenagers are returning to school, they are still feeling bored and isolated. There are still precautions in place such as many places require proof of vaccinations in order to participate in activities or go inside certain places. As a result, while kids are returning to high school, they still feel isolated from friends because they don’t have the same freedom as they had prior to the pandemic.

Most teenagers that I treat for psychotherapy are complaining that life is still boring. The main way they maintain contact with their friends is via texting or by communicating through online games. In addition they are spending a lot of time on YouTube, nextflix, and social media. Most teenagers have grown up with technology and social media so they do not really think about what they are doing on social media. As I said, they have grown up with social media and so have their friends so social media and texting seem harmless to them.

However, the internet is not as harmless as they assume. Due to texting and social media, kids can be teased 24/7 and some become so overwhelmed by the constant bullying that some victims of bullying commit suicide. Some teenagers who have been involved in bullying which results in a suicide have been arrested and charged by the police.

The issues with the internet are not limited to bullying. Sexual activity has become a major issue for teenagers and the internet. Many teenagers assume sexting or sending nude photos of themselves as normal teenage activity. However, the teenagers are under 18 years old. Therefore, sending or having nude photos of your girlfriend or boyfriend is violating child pornography laws because they are under 18 years old. Some states and cities are taking this very seriously. A teenager can be arrested, sent to jail and have to register for life as a sex offender for life if they are caught sending or having nude photos of their girlfriend or boyfriend. Because of the pandemic sexting has become more popular with teenagers and many teenagers are putting themselves at risk without knowing it.

When I tell parents about these changes many are shocked and concerned. However, many assume they do not have to worry about it because nothing like that would happen to their family. However, the statistics show by the age of 15 years old most boys have started to look at pornography. Additionally, teenagers are becoming sexually active in middle school. This is why many middle schools are handing out Condoms to their students. Therefore, while parents think they do not have to worry about their teen being sexually active or sexting because of the internet and social media children are becoming sexually active at an earlier age (CDC). Therefore, parents do have to worry about their teen becoming sexually active or sexting.

I understand that this is shocking and difficult for some parents to believe. Lisa Ling did an excellent show about boys becoming addicted to pornography. She also did another excellent show about the “age of consent” regarding teenagers, sexting and sexual activity. It contains interviews with families who had their worlds torn apart because their teenage son texted a nude picture of himself to a girl. Their son was arrested, sentenced to jail and has to register as a sex offender and he was only 15 years old. I have included the link to the show. I think it will be more effective to see and hear the facts that have unfortunately found themselves in situations they never thought possible. The program is on 40 minutes. If you have teenagers, please watch this episode because laws regarding sexual behavior are changing significantly. In California, the Governor just signed a new law making it a crime for someone to open a condom wrapper unless they have the other persons complete consent. This may be very confusing for teenagers. Since the laws are changing fast, please watch this video and discuss it with your teenager. Here is the link to Age of Consent https://youtu.be/QkCyJAlhCO4.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating children, teenagers and trauma victims. For more information about his work visit his website at www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3 or his podcasts on Spotify or Apple.

Another Halloween with the Coronavirus

It will soon be Halloween and kids are looking forward to one of their favorite holidays. However, again this year many children will be missing Halloween due to the Coronavirus pandemic. Many states are reporting an increase in Coronavirus cases due to the Delta variant. While over the past two weeks there has been a decrease in cases and hospitalizations, we still don’t have the Coronavirus under control especially for children. Therefore, it is still not medically safe for children to be trick or treating this year in most areas of our Country. In addition to missing Halloween, many children have missed their birthdays, playing with their friends, summer vacations. One year was bad enough, but now we are going on missing birthdays and holidays for two years. Yes we have vaccinations that help adults and children over 12 years old, but children under 12 do not have a vaccine that has been approved for their age group yet. Therefore, they remain at risk of catching the coronavirus. As a result, many children are feeling depressed and anxious and tired of waiting for vaccinations.

With everything these children have been through, hopefully we can find some safe, fun ways for them to celebrate Halloween. One possible option is, as a family, you can let your children pick out their costumes and since Halloween is on a Sunday this year, let them wear these costumes all weekend. Additionally as a family you can pick out scary movies to watch all weekend. You can also look online for Halloween treats they can make and have for the weekend. You can also carve pumpkins and prepare a special Halloween dinner. If you google Halloween recipes, you will find a number of dishes that have a Halloween theme. This may not be the same as trick or treating but it can be a fun time for the entire family.

Another possibility is to arrange trick or treating with your family and family friends. You can arrange that with family members and friends that are taking appropriate precautions such as wearing masks and social distancing and the parents are fully vaccinated so they are not likely to have the Coronavirus and you can stop by their homes and trick or treat. This way your children do get to trick or treat and you are trying to do it in the safest manner possible. Obviously, your children would need to wear masks and being feeling well. If they had a runny nose or a slight fever, you would need to keep them home. However, this occurs every year, if at the last minute a child is looking or acting ill, you need to keep them home. Obviously, your family and friends would be wearing masks when you went to their houses and if they were feeling sick they would let you know before you left your house so you would know to skip their house.

Another option would be if your city or church has a community center. You can have people who volunteer to pass out candy on Halloween at the hall. All the volunteers would wear masks and their temperatures would have been taken and they would be fully vaccinated to keep it as safe as possible. You could schedule 10 children at a time to go through the hall and trick or treat. Again, the children will need to be wearing masks and have had their temperatures taken. This way you are making it safe for the children and volunteers. You would need a schedule so you would not have too many children in the same space at the same time. Yes this will take a fair amount of work. However, it will allow children to celebrate a holiday specifically for children and they have a chance to act like children and forget the pandemic for a night. This would be a tremendous gift to children who have missed a lot of their childhood due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Some people may be tempted to say just forget the pandemic and let the children celebrate Halloween like they usually do. However, the research does document that children can and are contracting the Coronavirus. The research also shows that some children do need to be hospitalized due to the Coronavirus. The research shows that 1out of 3 children who are hospitalized will end up in the ICU. Finally the research numbers show children will and have died due to the Coronavirus. However, an additional complication during this time of the year is it is flu season too. It is possible for a child to have the flu and Coronavirus at the same time. Therefore, we cannot treat this like any other year and we need to brainstorm how children can celebrate Halloween safety.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating children and teenagers. For more information about Dr. Rubino’s work or his private practice visit his website at www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page www.Facebook.com/drrubino3 or his podcasts on Spotify or Apple.

New California Laws Regarding Condoms

Consent is very important in our lives, however, teenagers may not understand how important consent can be in life. A medical doctor cannot treat anyone without their consent. Teenagers may not be aware of how important consent is in life because they rely on their parents to provide consent for them. Since they are under 18 in most situations they need parental consent. Therefore, it is not an issue they deal with and it is not something that they think about on a daily basis.

There are some situations where teenagers need to be aware of consent and think about consent. The major area where they need to be aware of consent is dating. Consent starts with both the boy and girl agreeing that they want to go on a date with each other. If a relationship begins to develop and one or both of them want to make the relationship a sexual relationship then both the girl and the boy must agree and consent to a sexual relationship. They both need to consent to the sexual activity they are going to engage in. This may seem fairly basic but many boys are not aware of consent in all these situations.

Another major issue related to sexual relationships that teenagers are not usually aware of is that no means stop. If a girl says no at anytime while they are having sex, the boy must stop immediately. If the boy doesn’t stop as soon as the girl says no, he has committed rape. This is a fact that many teenage boys are not aware of regarding sex and consent. It is something we need to educate teenage boys about when they receive sexual education.

There is a new consent issue that teenage boys need to be educated about when they receive sex education. California has a new consent law referred to as “stealthing.” Governor Newsom just signed a new law making stealthing illegal without proper consent. You may be wondering what is stealthing? Stealthing is when a male opens a condom wrapper before the other person has consented to sex. Therefore, if a teenage boy opens a condom anticipating that he is going to have sex, he can be charged with sexual assault if the girl has not consented to having sex yet.

Currently the law doesn’t state that the boy would go to juvenile hall, but the law states they can be sued in civil court. I would advise patients who have teenagers to look up this new law and review all of the details. How do we know if someone consented to having sex before or after the condom is opened. There are not going to be a lot of witnesses when the condom is opened (hopefully, not). Do teenage boys need to record their sexual experiences to prove they had consent?

I understand that the intent of the law is so no one is pressured into doing anything sexually that they don’t want to do, but I think this law goes to far. In my professional opinion, we need to provide teenagers more education about sex and consent. They also need education about responsibility and sex too. Besides focusing on the fact that sex is physically enjoyable, we need to discuss when you have sex are you prepared to be parent? No contraception device is 100% effective. Therefore, every time you have sex you could become a parent. Also are you prepared to handle your emotions and the other person’s emotions associated with sex? Finally, are you mature enough to tell your physician so if you contract a sexually transmitted disease, you and your partner can receive the appropriate treatment.

Consent is important. However, there is much more involved with sex than the physical act and getting proper consent. If this is all we focus on, we are not doing our teenagers any favors. There is much more involved regarding being sexually intimate with a person. We need to focus on these issues and educate teenagers about these issues too.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 24 years experience treating children, teenagers and trauma victims. For more information about his work visit his website at www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page at www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3 or his podcasts on Spotify or Apple.

Teenagers Need to Earn Their Parents Respect

As an adolescent psychotherapist one of the major issues I deal with is respect. Teenagers feel disrespected by their parents and parents feel dissected by their teenagers. At this time of year with high school beginning many teenagers believe they are entitled to more respect because they are now high school students. They feel they should be allowed to make more of their own decisions and that their parents do not need to know everything about their friends or activities.

This article is somewhat different from the ones I usually write. While it is helpful for parents, I am directing a great deal of it towards teenagers.

Yes it is true that as teenagers you are becoming young adults and that you should be able to handle more responsibility. The big word in that last sentence is SHOULD. Just because you have graduated from middle school or high school doesn’t mean you are in charge of or that you are ready to handle all aspects of your life. You are a YOUNG adult. Noticed I capitalized the word young. There are still a number of life experiences for you to learn from and until you do, your parents are responsible for and probably need to help you.

A number of you have heard your parents say when you are 18 years old you can do as you like. This is the case if you are in a situation where you can financially support yourself and provide for all your needs. If you are still financially dependent on your parents, even though you are 18, your parents do have a right to set certain rules that you need to follow.

Prior to you turning 18, any trouble you get into, your parents are legally responsible for the damage. If you damage property, your parents are legally responsible. If you get arrested and put in Juvenile Hall, your parents receive a bill from County for the length a time you were in Juvenile Hall. These are just a few examples that your parents have being your parent.

You may think that you do not need your parents, but you need their permission to drive and basically for anything you want to do in life. Even if they give you permission to drive and you get your license, they have the ability to have your driver’s license suspended at any time they want while you are under the age of 18.

As I started off as a teenager you SHOULD be able to handle more responsibility. This responsibility is not an automatic gift you receive when you turn 13. This respect you so desperately want is something you have to earn. How do you earn it? You earn it by respecting the rules that your parents have set and by taking care of your responsibilities – for a teen, your primary responsibility is school. This means going to school on a regular basis, doing your homework, earning decent grades and not making poor choices such as drinking alcohol or drugs. For teenagers who have graduated high school you may feel the above guidelines do not apply to you. However, if you parents are assisting to pay for college, your living expenses and such things as your health insurance, the guidelines apply to you too. You may say this is unfair, well welcome to the adult world.

Ask your parents how many times they have to do something at work they feel is unfair, but if they want their job they have to do it. Ask your parents how many days they get up tired or not feeling well and they would prefer to stay home from work, but they still go to work. They go to work because the have a family to support and bills to pay. Your parents want you to succeed in life. If you feel they really are not giving you enough freedom, then ask your parents if you can discuss this issue with them. However, ask in a mature, respectful manner do not demand a conversation. When you discuss the issue with your parents have some things you have been doing, e.g., your homework, respecting curfew, that demonstrate you can handle more responsibility. Do not just demand it because your friends have it.

Remember the respect and maturity that you want, you must earn. You earn it by respecting your parents, other adults and recognizing that you have responsibilities. You do not get it because you turned 13 or because you graduated high school. This can be a difficult time of life, but it can be a time when you learn a lot about the world and yourself. If you remember you need to earn your parents trust and you actively try to do so, your parents will work with you and start to trust you. The choice is yours, you can make your teen years difficult or make them easier by working with your parents – you decide.

Parents while your teenagers have a lot to learn and do need to demonstrate they can handle responsibility, you need to give them opportunities to earn your respect. You have to have faith in your teenager and say yes sometimes even when you have doubts. Obviously you start by saying yes to the little request and allow them to earn your respect. Also if you have doubts or concerns talk to your teenager about high school or college. If you have open minded conversations with your teenager, they will respect and trust you. This provides a situation where you and your teen can have open, honest conversations in the good and bad times. It can help you develop a closer relationship with your teen and you can assist your teenager in becoming a responsible young adult you can be proud of.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 20 years experience treating adolescents and children. To learn more about his work or private practice visit his website www.RubinoCounseling.com or www.rcs-ca.com or his Facebook page www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Is Your Child Dealing with Anxiety due to the Pandemic or ADHD

Schools are starting to reopen during a pandemic. Many schools are still arguing about if teachers and students over 12 years old must be vaccinated in addition to arguing if students and teachers must wear masks while at school. While these debates are occurring students are adjusting to be back at school and many students are adjusting to new schools entirely. A student who was a freshman in high school last year never set foot on the high school campus because most schools were operating remotely. Therefore, they are sophomores this year, but it is the first time they have been on campus or interacted with other students and teachers. For many students they are experiencing anxiety and panic attacks as they return to school. Additionally for high school students, they really missed out on an entire year of their high school experience. How will this impact them?

Now that schools have resumed so has the fighting parents and teenagers have over getting homework completed and turned in on time. This means parents are once again getting notices from their children’s schools that their child is not doing homework and not paying attention in class. When kids were attending school remotely, many teachers and parents were not as concerned because they knew doing school remotely was very difficult. However, now that students are back in the classroom, teachers and parents are no longer ignoring attention issues or difficulties with homework.

As a result, some schools and family members may be suggesting to parents that their child has ADHD and needs medication. Many parents are not sure about the diagnosis and they are concerned about their child taking ADHD medication. I hear this very often from parents and do many assessments on children to determine if a child has ADHD. Yes ADHD is a really disorder, but too many teachers and schools rush to the conclusion that a child has ADHD and needs medication. Additionally given everything children have been through with the pandemic and remote learning, we need to be very careful about labeling a child with ADHD. There are a number of other options such as depression, anxiety and boredom.

According to statistics by the American Psychological Association, five percent of children in the United States have ADHD. It is also more common in males, however it does also occur in families. According to the CDC 15.9% of boys and 5.6% of girls have ADHD. However, not every child who has ADHD requires medication. Many children can be treated with psychotherapy and behavior modification. Therefore, if your child is diagnosed with ADHD do not rush to medicate your child. There are different subtypes of ADHD and different severities of the diagnosis.

If you child does have ADHD, they are entitled to accommodations such as extra time taking a test. It’s important to get them the accommodations they need. Children who have ADHD, but do not receive accommodations tend to show signs of low self-esteem around the fifth grade. Accommodations for ADHD can be covered by a 504 plan. However, if your child has severe ADHD and needs resource assistance too, they are entitled to an Individual Educational Plan (IEP). Many schools may tell parents ADHD does not qualify for an IEP. This is not true. The severity of the ADHD determines if a child needs an IEP. They would qualify under the categories of Emotional Disturbance or Other Health Impairments.

If you feel your child may have ADHD or their school suggests the idea, make sure you have your child appropriately assessed by a professional who specializes in ADHD. In the past schools would often diagnosis children with ADHD. Schools are no longer supposed to make this diagnosis. If they feel a child might have ADHD, they are supposed to have your child evaluated. Many parents take their child to their pediatrician, however, many pediatricians are not trained in diagnosing ADHD. I would suggest having your child evaluated by a mental health clinician trained in working with children and in assessing for ADHD.

As I stated above, if you are going to have your child evaluated for ADHD, make sure you take your child to a mental health clinician who specializes in children and in doing assessments. The assessment for ADHD is not very difficult and an appropriate evaluation by an appropriate mental health clinician should cost around $250 depending on where you live. I have seen some parents who have spent thousands of dollars getting CT scans, MRIs and PET scans. You do not need an expensive scan of your child’s brian to diagnosis ADHD.

The DSM V, the diagnostic manual that mental health clinicians use, list the criteria needed for the diagnosis. I am including a link to the Center for Disease Control which list the criteria for the diagnosis and other information about ADHD, http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd/diagnosis.html. Typically the diagnosis can be made by a clinician interviewing the parents, having a play session or two with the child and observing the child at school or consulting with the teachers. However, remember if you are going to have your child evaluated for ADHD, you want a mental health clinician who specializes in treating children and assessing children for ADHD. Your child’s pedestrian should be able to refer you to someone or if you call your insurance they will probably have referrals.

Before you rush to have your child assessed, remember some basic facts. Most children between the ages of two to five are very active. They also have very short attention spans. Sometimes you need to give a child some time to mature especially if you have a boy. Remember boys mature slower than girls and tend to be more active than girls. It is important to keep these facts in mind when you are wondering if your child has ADHD.

Now if you child is more hyperactive than other kids his age or his attention span is shorter than most kids his age, there might be an issue. Also if there is a strong family history of ADHD in the family such as his father had ADHD as a child and paternal and maternal uncles all had ADHD as children, there might be an issue. Also if your child was born premature or there were complications during the pregnancy or child birth, there might be an issue. Premature babies or babies with a difficult pregnancy or birth are more likely to have ADHD and learning disabilities.

Bottom line, if someone suggests that your child has ADHD don’t rush to the pedestrian seeking medication. Compare your child’s behavior to other children and consider the risk factors. If your child doesn’t have many risk factors for ADHD maybe wait six months and reassess the situation. Also remember many children are experiencing anxiety due to the pandemic. Anxiety can easily look like ADHD. Therefore, instead of medication, maybe your child needs therapy for anxiety.

The most important thing to remember is if you decide to have your child assessed for ADHD, make sure you go to a mental health clinician who specializes in children and ADHD. You want a mental health clinician who specializes in treating children with ADHD and assessing children for ADHD. Also remember you do not need any expensive scans like a CT scan. There are other treatment options besides medication, so do not rush to medicate your child either. Consider all the treatment options.

Dr. Michael Rubino specializes in treating children and assessing children. He has over 24 years experience treating and assessing children and teenagers. For more information about Dr. Michael Rubino’s work visit his websites at www.rcs-ca.com, http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page http://www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3 or his podcasts on Spotify or Apple.

Dr Michael Rubinio

Understanding Your Teenager

Month: October 2021