Honoring Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Honoring Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Today is Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. The purpose of this day is to honor the memory of Dr. King and his message of acceptance and tolerance. However, are we honoring his memory and message? An argument could be made that no we are not honoring him or his message. In fact, you can say we have forgotten his message. Hate crimes have been increasing and antisemitic acts have increased significantly. Some people are trying to find out why, but the Executive Branch appears to be ignoring these changes.

In addition to an increase in hate crimes, we have had mass shootings targeting people who were homosexual or Jewish. This does not honor Dr. King and his message of love and acceptance.

If we are not honoring his message, what are we teaching children born after the year 2000? These children never had a chance to be exposed to Dr. King’s message nor have they seen the discrimination that has occurred in the past. Many teenagers are wearing shirts or getting tattoos with racist symbols. Many of these teens have no idea what these symbols really mean. For many people we have felt we made a great deal of progress in our country regarding race relations. In fact, we had an African-America President. Therefore, some people have feel we qdo not need to teach children about past discrimination.

However, discrimination based on race, color, creed, sexuality and physical ability is very much alive in the United States. We do need to teach children about Hitler and the Holocaust. We need to teach children about the White Supremest. We need to educate our children about their message and their symbols they use. We also need to educate children about how easily these people can come back and that discrimination still exist in the United States.

Dr. King’s message was to accept everyone and respect their human dignity. We have no right to judge someone based on race, color, creed, sexuality or physical ability. We are all human beings and deserve to be treated respectfully. He did point out that there are people who will decide to judge and hate others based on differences. Dr. King, like Ghandi before him, pointed out that we accept these people too. They are still people even though they are choosing to be cruel to others.

While he told people to acknowledge these people as human beings, he did not say to accept their hate. His message, like Ghandi, was nonviolence. You can accept the person without being cruel to them because of their message. Dr. King believed the power of love is stronger than the power of hate. Finding away to accept and love those who judge you is the strongest way of fighting the hate in their hearts.

If we look around, this message is still be taught to children. As adults we need to reinforce it. The Disney movie Frozen is an example. In the movie it teaches children how if someone does not feel love they will act out and make poor decisions. It also teaches that “love will thaw.” In other words, love is a stronger force than hate and can eliminate hate. This movie also looks at judging people based on differences. So here is a modern day example of Dr. King’s message. Love and acceptance will triumph over hate. As adults we need to reinforce this message to our children.

The High School Musical movies, by Disney, teach kids to accept people for who they are, not based on stereotypes. Therefore, a very smart girl can be pretty and a great dancer. A boy who is great at basketball can also enjoy baking and be a great baker too. These are great examples of accepting people for who they are and who they were meant to be. This is Dr. Martin Luther King’s message.

It is very important that we do so at this time in our country. We have people killing people due to the color of the skin, their religion or sexuality. This is not what Dr. King was teaching us. We have people in our government who want to treat people differently because of their color, religion or sexuality. Again this is not Dr. King’s message. Dr. King did not want us to hate these people either. He encouraged all of us to accept and love each other. Love can triumph over hate. It has in the past and it can again.

Therefore, in order to honor Dr. King and his message sit down with your children and teenagers and educate them about Dr. King’s message. Love is stronger than hate. I have included one of his quotes at the top of this blog that you can use.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist with over 20 years experience treating teenagers and children. He is also one of the founding members of the National Alive and Free Board. For more information regarding his work or private practice visit his website http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/drrubino3.

Teen Addiction to Nicotine is Increasing due to Vaping

Teen Addiction to Nicotine is Increasing due to Vaping

Vaporizing has been getting a great deal of attention with the recent deaths and number of people becoming ill. Vaporizing was marketed as a safer way to use nicotine or marijuana than cigarettes or smoking. However, we are now learning this may not be true and vaping, juul and e-cigarettes may be more dangerous. Also e-cigarettes were promoted as a way to decrease the use of nicotine. However, research shows this is not true either.

Many people thought that teenage tobacco use was decreasing. In fact, over the past few years teenage tobacco use had been decreasing. However, a recent report by the CDC indicates that teenage tobacco use has increased. Between 2017 and 2018, 1.3 million teenagers starting using tobacco. In high school students the increase is 77% and for middle school students the increase is 48.5% (CDC). This increase eliminates any decrease that in the use of tobacco since 1999.

The report contributes the increase in smoking to e-cigarettes, vaporizing and the use of JUUL. These products especially juul uses flavored tobacco such as bubblegum. Teenagers start using the flavored tobacco thinking it is safe and become hooked on nicotine. It is then an easy jump from juul or vaporizing to smoking cigarettes. In the period between 2017-2018 the use of Juul went up 600%. Tobacco companies are targeting teenagers with the flavored tobacco products. As a result, teenagers are trying it because they think it is safe. However, they are smoking more when using a juul, vaporizing or using an e-cigarette. Since they are using flavored tobacco products they think they are safe. However, they are gradually becoming addicted to nicotine and addicted to cigarettes.

The Juul is so addictive that many retailers who sell tobacco products are refusing to sell juul products anymore. One store owner said he would not continue to carry juuls because it was an easy way for tobacco companies to get teenagers addicted to nicotine.

If you are a parent, you need to discuss this situation with your teenagers and children in middle school. I hear many teenagers and middle school students tell me that vaporizing and juuls are safe to use. They tell me how different they are from cigarettes. However, when I challenge them to stop vaporizing or using a juul, they find out that it is very difficult. They then admit that maybe vaporizing or a juul is not as safe as they thought. However, they are now addicted to nicotine.

Therefore, if you have a calm conversation with your teenager and discuss how any type of vaporizing (vaping pens, Juul, e-cigarettes) can be addictive and more importantly can be deadly. Discuss how many teens have developed a chemical pneumonia associated with any type of vaping. Also discuss many teens have died and we still do not have an answer to how this pneumonia starts and there is no treatment plan that is working all the time. Therefore, when they vape, they are taking a chance of becoming addicted and developing a pneumonia that could kill them. If you discuss it with them calmly maybe you can prevent your teenager from becoming addicted to nicotine or developing pneumonia. Also vaporizing and juuls create a significant number of problems at school too.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist who specializes in treating adolescents and children. He has over 20 years experience working with teenagers and children. For more information about Dr. Rubino’s work or private practice please visit his website http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Trying to Have A Stress Free Thanksgiving Dinner

Trying to Have A Stress Free Thanksgiving Dinner

The Holiday Season is coming up fast. Stores are already putting up holiday decorations and people are discussing holiday plans. The first family holiday is Thanksgiving so I will address some ways to get through the day without it being extremely stressful. For many people this is a happy time and for others it is a stressful time. The Holidays can bring up family issues that have not been resolved yet or everyone is trying to make the day prefect that it becomes a stressful day not a happy one.

Thanksgiving is coming up first so let’s deal with that day. Thanksgiving with family can mean an increase in chaos and stress. Having a Thanksgiving plan can reduce anxiety, decrease the likelihood of arguments and increase the likelihood that everyone has a happy and enjoyable Thanksgiving that they were expecting.

Lori Lite who writes about stress uses the acronym G-R-A-T-E-F-U-L as her Thanksgiving stress guide. It helps her and others get through the day in a peaceful manner. Each letter reminds you of something to do or a way to view the day so you do not get upset.

So here is how to use Gratitude as your Thanksgiving Stress Reliever.

G- Gratitude is the opposite of stress. It is difficult to feel stressed out when we are feeling gratitude.

R- Relax your expectations and let the day unfold. You might be surprised by the outcome.

A- Acceptance is the opposite of judgment. If we accept our family member for who they are and what they are capable of we can relax and enjoy ourselves.

T- Teens can be a part of Thanksgiving. Ask them what they would like to bring to the table. Let them bring it.

E- Empower children and let them help with age appropriate assignments. Putting the nuts out or making the centerpiece. Let them do it their way…not your way.

F– Focus on family for this day. Put all work and worries on the shelf

U– Unplug the electronics for dinner so that everyone can be fully present.

L- Love is often overlooked when we are busy. Cook with love… Speak with love… Show your love and gratitude for your family on this Thanksgiving Day.

There is another acronym is recommend and that is H-A-L-T.

If you do need to discuss something and it’s seems the tension may be high using these steps:

Hunger – If someone is hungry get them something to eat before you talk.

Anger – If the person appears angry, take a time out and decide on a different time to talk. If they are already angry you may exacerbate the situation by trying to talk.

Lonely – Notice a person’s mode. Often if they are feeling lonely talking can increase the tension.

Tired – Trying to talk to some one when they are tired can often lead to an argument. Let the person rest before you discuss the situation.

This might seem very simple and obvious, but at times the best solutions are rather simple. Also you may want to practice using this in your daily life. It may seem simple, but it may be harder to do than you think because you are accustomed to doing things and viewing life in a certain way. This idea may challenge you to reassess how you approach life in general. Also this acronym may be helpful in your daily life.

Many of us are not use to looking at our lives in terms of what we have to be grateful for. Also many of us have a hard time relaxing and not worrying about work or other things we need to do. I have found that just being in the moment is difficult for most people. Most of us believe we always have to be doing something. This creates stress and disappointment. Finally, since we feel we must always be doing something, disconnecting from cellphones and other electronics can be very difficult for many people. However, think about it? How can you have fun and enjoy the day with your family, if your mind is not fully present? You can’t. Furthermore, this can create tension for others because they feel ignored and for you because you feel they don’t respect how important what you are doing at the moment is to you. As a result, you have stress which can turn into an argument and everyone is upset. A day of happiness becomes a day of anger and disappointment.

Therefore, in order to avoid this possibility trying use the words GRATEFUL and HALT and following these guidelines for the day can help reduce tension and make it a nice day for everyone. What do you have to lose?

Dr. Michael Rubino specializes in working with children, teenagers and their families. He has over 20 years experience. For more information about his work or private practice visit his website at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com, http://www.rcs-ca.com or visit his Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/drrubino3.

The Truth about Mental Health in the United States

The Truth about Mental Health in the United States

Many of us assume that living in the United States provides us access to the best physical and mental health care in the world. Unfortunately, this is not true. One example of this fact comes from the ABC News Show 20/20 which aired on 9/11/15. An Olympic Athlete had been living with Bipolar Disorder for over 20 years even though her brother committed suicide due to being Bipolar. The family never discussed it due to shame associated with suicide and mental illness. The Athlete and her husband asked for help for 10 years and despite the fact she had all the symptoms and a family history of Bipolar, no one diagnosed her. She lives in the United States, her brother committed suicide because he was Bipolar and it still took 10 years for her to be diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and not dismissed by psychiatrist as someone who was over reacting. Now that she is diagnosed she is dealing with the shame of being Bipolar.

We often hear parents complain that their teenager is driving them crazy or a teenager complaining how unfair their parents are to live with on a daily basis. However, there are another set of complaints that get ignored on a routine basis. The complaints that get ignored are parents begging for mental health care for their teen or a teen crying out for help by cutting themselves or running away on a regular basis. Many of us assume that if a parent wants mental health care help for their teen or if a teen needs help, all either one of them has to do is ask for help. Unfortunately, this is not how our world works. I have been working as a psychotherapist who treats teenagers for over 20 years. There have been many times I could not have a suicidal teenager hospitalized because the hospital had no beds for a suicidal teenager or the insurance refused to authorize the admission to the hospital.

It is very common for parents to ask everyone they can think of for help for their teenager and the only answer they get is, “I am sorry we cannot help you or your child.”

It is also not uncommon for teens to ask for help by admitting to someone that they are feeling suicidal and the teen is told stop being so dramatic or “sorry there is nothing we can do for you, but try calling this number.”

Some of you may assume that I must be exaggerating, but I am not. I have had many parents beg me to see their child because no one has any appointments or they don’t deal with their teen’s issues. When I interview the parents, they have been every where asking for help, but no one has offered any help or referred them to someone else because they don’t deal with their child’s issues.

For example, one Thanksgiving I had a mother have my answering service page me and she was begging me for help because her teen was suicidal. I referred her to the County hospital because based on what she said the teen needed to be hospitalized. She told me the County hospital gave her my telephone number because they had no more beds for anyone who was suicidal. The parents tell me they feel like no one cares.

Again, some people might believe this is an isolated case. Sadly this is not an isolated case. I specialize in treating suicidal and bipolar teens. There have been a number of times I have sent a suicidal teen by ambulance from my office to the County hospital only to have the teen released in less than an hour because the hospital had no beds. I had one person on the Psychiatric Crises Unit tell me on the telephone unless the person had a shotgun in their mouth not to send them to the Hospital because they had no beds for suicidal teens.

Now, some of you may assume the situation would be different if the teen had private insurance because I have been referring to the County Hospital. If you are thinking having private insurance would make a difference, you are wrong. I have had many private insurance companies deny my request to authorize additional therapy sessions for a suicidal teenager. When I remind the insurance that the teen is suicidal and needs therapy to prevent them from acting on their feeling, they often say to refer them to a community counseling center. When I remind them that most non-profit counseling centers have closed due to the economy they simply say sorry they have exhausted their benefits and they will no longer cover their treatment.

This puts the therapist in a difficult position. Do you just discharge the teen or do you continue to treat the teen for a low fee or for free? When 1 out of 5 teens have a psychological condition that needs treatment, what do you do when treatment is denied or there are no treatment options? Besides 1 out of 5 teens needing mental health care, the CDC has recently moved suicide from the third leading cause of death to the second leading cause of death for children 10 to 18 years old. Therefore, there are many teens who desperately need mental health care and can die without it. Also, when you examine the results further you find that teens who need therapy but fail to receive it are more likely to get involved with drugs, crime, are more likely to drop out of school, more likely to get pregnant or father a child and that child is more likely to become a foster child. These teens are also more likely to end up on probation, homeless and on welfare.

As a society we do not place much emphasis on mental health care. Mental health care programs are always some of the first programs cut when the budget is cutback. In fact if you look at the recent cut backs due to the Congress not balancing the budget, mental health programs were some of the first programs to be cut.

I find it very interesting that Contra Costa County had enough money to build a new Juvenile Hall, which is three times the size of the old Juvenile Hall, but there was not enough money to fund a large number of mental health services which had to be cut.

We often look at teens who are acting out and blame their parents. We ask why don’t they get their child the help they need? What stops them from helping their teenager? Why is the teen always getting involved with drugs or not going to school? The answer could be because the teen needs mental health care and the parents have been and continue to try to get their teen help but their is no help. The teen may be acting out because they are tired of asking for help and being in pain so they start looking for the easiest way out of pain.

If we want our teenagers to grow up to become productive members of society then we need to provide them with the mental health care they need. If we want parents to be responsible parents, then we need to provide parents options for how to get their teens help when they ask for it.

With the number of mass shootings, the significant increase in the number of children with anxiety disorders and the epidemic of teenagers cutting and teenage suicide, I am surprised we have not made it easier and more affordable for teenagers to get adequate mental health care. The President states we need to address mental health care, but I have seen very few changes in mental health care.

I have been treating teens for over 20 years and it is still a problem to get a teenager residential care if they need it. Also it is still difficult to get teens medication at an affordable price. I had a teen the other day who needs medication but they had no medical coverage to see a psychiatrist. The parent made an appointment but the fee for the visit was $450 and they would not reduce the fee. So what do they do?

We can write our Congressmen and Senators and demand that they fund community mental health centers. We can also demand that private insurance companies be required to offer teenagers and their families adequate mental health benefits based on what professional therapists are recommending. The professional treating the child knows what the child needs not some clerical worker with a Bachelors degree who is answering phone calls at the insurance company.

In short, if we want our teenagers to survive their teen years we all need to act together and demand that our children receive the treatment they need and deserve. Mental health care is not a dirty word. There is no difference between mental health and physical health. Therefore, they needed to be treated the same and we need to eliminate the stigma associated with mental health issues.

Finally, private insurance companies make huge profits and drive the cost of health care up based on how they do business. If we don’t start to speak up for our kids, they will never receive the care they need. Look at your next pay stub and look at how much you pay for health insurance and compare that to the benefits you receive. When you take your teenager to a psychotherapist most insurance companies only pay the therapist $75. Your copay is part of the payment. Your premiums are high, but they do not pay it out to providers they keep it.

Dr Michael Rubino has over 20 years experience working with teenagers and their parents as long as Bipolar patients. To find out more about Dr Michael Rubino and his private practice visit his website at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Marijuana is not as safe as teenagers think

Marijuana is not as safe as teenagers think

Most teenagers think marijuana is safe especially now that you can buy it. However, this is not the truth. The U.S. Surgeon General issued the following statement regarding teenagers and marijuana.

U.S. Surgeon General’s Warning on Marijuana Use and the Developing Brain

On August 29, the U.S. Surgeon General issued a new advisory on marijuana use and the developing brain. The advisory focuses on the dangers of marijuana for adolescents and for pregnant women.

The statement from Surgeon General Vice Adm. Jerome Adams emphasized “the importance of protecting our Nation from the health risks of marijuana use in adolescence and during pregnancy. Recent increases in access to marijuana and in its potency, along with misperceptions of safety of marijuana endanger our most precious resource, our nation’s youth.”

marijuana plant-unsplash.jpgTwo major changes in recent years are contributing to increased use of marijuana and greater risks from its use. Marijuana is more available and acceptable as a growing number of states legalize its use by adults for medicinal or recreational purposes. The Surgeon General notes that the marijuana available today is much more potent than in the past. Typical concentration of Delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), a component of marijuana, increased three-fold between 1995 and 2014. Higher doses of THC increase the risks of physical dependence and addiction and are more likely to lead to anxiety, agitation, paranoia and psychosis.

Marijuana is commonly used by youth and young adults—in 2018 an estimated one in eight (12.5%) youth 12 to 17 years old and more than one in three (34.8%) young adults aged 18 to 25 had used marijuana. (SAMHSA 2019) Frequent marijuana use during adolescence can impair learning and is associated with changes in the areas of the brain involved in attention, memory, decision-making and motivation. It is also associated with a risk of schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders. Adolescents are at particular risk for cannabis use disorder and can experience significant withdrawal symptoms. An estimated one in six daily users become dependent on cannabis. (APA Resource Document)

A 2019 APA position statement notes similar concerns: “There is no current scientific evidence that cannabis is in any way beneficial for the treatment of any psychiatric disorder. In contrast, current evidence supports, at minimum, a strong association of cannabis use with the onset of psychiatric disorders. Adolescents are particularly vulnerable to harm, given the effects of cannabis on neurological development . . . There is great variability of in the form, dose and potency of cannabis. Furthermore, there are numerous other compounds in products marketed as cannabidiol or cannabis with unknown health effects.”

Use of marijuana by pregnant women has increased in recent years. Marijuana use during pregnancy can affect the developing fetus and is associated with adverse outcomes, including lower birth weight. Both the American College and Obstetricians and Gynecologists and the American Academy of Pediatrics recommend against marijuana use by pregnant women. Harmful effects of marijuana use can also be passed on to a newborn through breast milk. It can affect the newborn’s brain development and contribute to hyperactivity, poor cognitive function or other problems.

Middle School in the Year 2019

Middle School in the Year 2019

The school year is beginning and many parents are focused on their children’s transition into High School, College or Kindergarten. However, there is another important transition for children, Middle School. This is a major transition for pre-adolescents. As a psychotherapist who works with adolescents, I am very familiar with what is happening on High School and Middle School campuses and how big the transition is into Middle School these days. However, some parents are not aware of what happens in Middle School today. One example, when I mention to parents who have a child going into middle school or a child in middle school, if they have spoken to their child about drugs and alcohol, I am told no.

I hear parents say every day that they don’t need to worry about drugs or alcohol with their child in middle school because their child is too young for that right now. Well the reality is that Middle School Students are drinking, using drugs and having sex. Many parents are unaware of what is happening in Middle Schools these days. Drugs and alcohol are just the tip of the iceberg. Children that are in the age group of middle school are now involved numerous dangerous activities such as selling drugs.

To begin with, most middle school campuses are better pharmacies than your pharmacy. I have had middle school kids say they can get Vicodin, Concerta, Ecstasy and of course weed and alcohol on their school campus. Some kids use at school and some use after school and on the weekends. More and more middle school kids are deciding to experiment with drugs and alcohol due to the pressure to feel successful as a teenager and so they fit in with friends. They see other kids at school using and they want to be part of the popular group so they think about and often try drinking or vaping.

Also many middle school kids are sexually active, but they don’t think they are sexually active. They think because they are not engaging in intercourse and they are not sexual active. Most 6th graders tell me oral sex doesn’t count as being sexually active. The kids say they are just “messing around” with each other and do not consider this sex. They also have no idea about sexually transmitted diseases or how to protect themselves from contracting STDs or getting pregnant. However, the number of middle school kids engaging in oral sex and intercourse has increased significantly over the last few years. The rate is now high enough that some middle schools, such as the San Francisco School District, are disrupting condoms to middle school kids. Yes, Middle Schools are giving condoms to children in the sixth grade. These kids are only 11 years old.

Another common issue in middle school is bullying. However, we are not just talking about one kid teasing another kid at school anymore. Today there is for a group of kids teasing one kid and it is not just at school. Now kids are using Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and texting by cellphone to tease and harass other kids. As many of you may recall there have been a number of kids who have committed suicide due to the teasing occurring at school. I wrote an article about a middle school girl who committed suicide and in her obituary she left a note to the other students just asking them to be nice to each other.

Another issue with teasing, is that a number of middle school students have been arrested for photos they text and for harassment. Besides teasing, texting a nude photo of a student in middle school means the middle school student violated child pornography laws. Something many parents and students are not aware of is that a child can be charged with violating child pornography laws. When a child texts a nude photo of a middle school student, who is under 18 years old, it violates child pornography laws and the child who texts it and received it can both be arrested. The law is violated because the child in the photo is under 18 years old.

Also many kids in middle school, especially boys, don’t feel safe and are afraid of someone trying to beat them up before or afraid school. They say they have to fight because other kids are recording it and posting it on YouTube. Boys are bragging about their fights on YouTube and comparing how many people have watched their fight with their friend’s fight. Therefore, boys feel they must fight, otherwise if they don’t fight the other kids will think they are a “whimp.” Due to this fear many middle school students carry knives, metal pipes, guns or anything they can think of to protect themselves. This is very sad that kids have to live in fear for their lives and safety at school. The number of mass shootings at schools and the mass shooting drills they do at school exacerbate this fear. Also parents and students don’t realize, if a student is caught with any of these items on campus, they can be removed from their entire school district and required to go to continuation school. In addition, the school can have the student arrested. Due to mass shootings, schools take anyone possessing items that can severely hurt someone very seriously.

These are just a few of the issues that are occurring at all middle schools and they are very serious. Your child is not going to come to you to ask about these issues or tell you about them because they feel embarrassed and they are afraid of getting in to trouble. So parents even though you may feel embarrassed or awkward discussing these issues with your 11 year-old child, please do so. If you notice anything about your child’s behavior that seems different to you and you feel a sense of concern, ask your child about what is happening at school and with friends. Mention they are getting older and as a result the issues in their lives are becoming more difficult. Therefore, when you talk to your pre-teen mention drinking, sex or being teased and ask if they need to talk about it and they can talk about it anytime they need to. You may be saving their lives because they are dealing with things they know nothing about and these things can kill or have life long effects.

Here is a YouTube video that might help:

Life Talk | PSA: This could be your child (Teen drinking, alcohol,partying,peer pressure)

Dr Michael Rubino is an expert dealing with adolescents and adolescent issues. He has over 20 years experience treating adolescents. For more information about Dr. Michael Rubino’s or his Facebook page http://www.Facebook.com/Drrubino3.

Important New Facts about Teenagers and Vaping

Important New Facts about Teenagers and Vaping

Teenagers know it is illegal for them to use marijuana in the open. Therefore, many teenagers have found ways that they can use marijuana and feel it is legal and safe. They don’t worry about anyone noticing they are smoking or that anyone can smell marijuana. The answer Many teenagers believe e-cigarettes, vaping pens and Hookah pens are the answer. Unfortunately, parents and teachers are not fully aware of this methods and teens can use them in class and at home.

Vaporizing is the newest method teens are using. They use vaping pens for nicotine and for marijuana. I have seen teens actively using vaporizing pens on school campuses and trying to use them in my office. They feel they are safe and they will not get into trouble using them.

Many people will say E cigarettes and vaping are safer than smoking. Teenagers have believed this for years and used this argument as a reason they should be allowed to use them. However the newest research does not indicate that is true. Research by the CDC indicates that vaping or using e-cigarettes put teenagers at a higher risk to become addicted to strong drugs than marijuana.

A teenager’s brain is still developing. This is why if they sustain a head trauma, their prognosis and recovery is better than someone who is 40 years old. Research is showing that since the neural pathways in a teenage brain are still developing, when teenagers vape it creates changes in the teenage brains. The research by the CDC indicates that these changes increase the probability that the teen will become addicted easier to stronger drugs than marijuana.

Another research study just released shows just using an e-cigarette or vaping just once creates changes in a person’s artery. For example, after vaping once the femoral artery narrows. The research does indicate that after a few hours it returns to it’s normal size, but the question they are now exploring is do these changes become permanent at some point.

Finally, the most recent results to be released by the CDC indicate that a number of states are investigating the link between vaping and severe lung damage and illnesses. California is investigating 19 cases where teens who used vaping pens on a regular basis were admitted to hospitals with rare lung issues.

Besides these results teenagers believe by vaping they are exposed to less THC. However, research indicates the opposite. Vaping weed allows more THC into a teenager’s body and brain. In fact, people who vape weed state that it creates more of an intense body high that lasts for a day or two. People warn that if someone is not use to this it can create a traumatic experience for the teen. With vaporizing someone can do what is referred to as a volcano. The weed is vaporized into a plastic bag so it can be inhaled over time.

People who I have spoken to state vaporizing is not as safe as teens think. The body high it creates and the length of the high could be traumatic for a teenager. However, they are seeing more teens getting into it even though they don’t know exactly what they are getting into. Combine these facts with the recent research results and it is becoming more apparent that vaping is not as safe as teenagers think and that teenagers do not have all the facts about vaping.

Parents do your own research and talk to your teens. There are more and more drugs out there and more ways to use them than ever before. Teenagers don’t know exactly what they are getting into and can end up in a bad situation. They need your guidance more than ever regarding these new drugs and methods of use.

The Hookah Pens and Vaporizers are very popular today. In addition so are the designer drugs such as Mollies and Thunder Bolts. No one knows exactly what is in them so many Emergency Room doctors are unable to treat these teens and they die.

Another thing teens are using is GNC stores. Everything in there is a vitamin so it does not have to be tested by the FDA. However many of these vitamins used at the right amount give teens a long lasting high. Many parents don’t suspect anything because their teen says they are taking vitamins for their sport team their on. Look at and research anything they are taking.

Well your teenager has found a new toy to use. Many teens have been smoking Hookah because they believe that it is safer than cigarettes or marijuana. Unfortunately they are wrong. It is just as dangerous and might be more dangerous.

Smoking Hookah is a group activity that is common in the Middle East and India. Since it is a group activity, it is appealing to teens. Also since many adults here in the United States know little about it, this makes it more appealing to teens because it is easier to lie about. If you look up Hookah, you will find there are numerous places that teens can go in Pleasant Hill, Walnut Creek and Concord to buy a Hookah pipe and Hookah to smoke. There are also Hookah cafes similar to Starbucks where teens can go and smoke it. And now finally there is the Hookah pen. It looks like a regular pen so they can take it any where such as school and smoke.

However, the Hookah pipe can be used for smoking more than Hookah. The teens are combining Hookah with marijuana to get high. Now that there is a Hookah pen, or vaporizer pen, teens can easily take this to school and smoke during class. As a parent you may want to discuss Hookah with your teen and see what they know or don’t know. You may want to discuss the pros and cons too. Also remind them if they get caught with the pen on campus, they are in trouble.

One thing this should point out to parents is that you should never let your your guard down. Teens are always developing new ways and new devices to get high. Check out this video on YouTube to learn more about these pens.

Read more about the effect of these “waterpipe” smoking devices from the World Health Organization.

Dr. Michael Rubino specializes in treating teens. He has over 20 years experience treating children and teenagers. For more information on Dr Michael Rubino’s work or his private practice visit his web site at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page at http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

A Generation of Children have Grown UP Afraid

A Generation of Children have Grown UP Afraid

Almost 18 years ago the 9/11 terrorist attack occurred changing our lives forever. This attack changed our Country and the world our children grow up in. Anyone who is over 30 years old grew up in a world where there were good times and then there were bad times. So people over 30 years old learned that life has ups and downs. However, for anyone born in the year 2000 or later, never had this experience of the world. They grew up with warnings about potential terrorist attacks and 20 years of mass shootings mainly at schools. They have lived in a world of chaos.

The majority of people who are under 30 years old have grown up in a world where there has been one tragedy after another. People in this generation have experienced the tragedy of 9/11 attacks, the wars in Iran and Afghanistan, and hearing nightly on the news about terrorist attacks and terrorist threats.

In addition to hearing about terrorist attacks around the world children growing up in the current generation have also had to deal with mass shootings at schools, and shopping centers over the past twenty years. No one who is over 30 years old had to deal with mass school shootings throughout the country, while they were growing up. Furthermore in addition to the violence that the current generation has had to endure they have also had to deal with the uncertain financial situation of our country. Children in this generation have heard about the possibility of the economy collapsing and in addition many children in this generation have experienced their parents losing their jobs and as a result also losing their homes. As a result, children growing up today are facing the facts they may never own a home and financially they may not do as well as their parents.

What has this done to our children? From my experience as a psychotherapist who works with children and teens, I have seen a devastating impact on children growing up today. Many of the children I work with carry knives with them. They tell me they need the knives for protection. Many of the kids I treat have told me, they don’t know if they will live to be 30 because of today’s violence. When they are faced with 3 mass shootings in less than one week and one of those shootings occurred at the Gilory Garlic Festival, you can start to understand why they may be thinking this way.

I have also seen an increase in depression and anxiety. With the violence children experience at school and when their family cannot afford housing or food, they see no hope for a future. Yes in the United States, there are many children who are homeless and hungry. In fact, the rate of homelessness and hunger for children is higher in the United States than some third world countries.

As a result, many children and teenagers are looking for an escape and they are finding unhealthy ways to escape. The suicide rate in our country has increased every year. It is now the second leading cause of death for children in the United States. Children as young as 8 years old are committing suicide. In addition to suicide, children and teenagers are turning to drugs. We are not talking about marijuana, we are talking about meth, crack and heroin and new drugs such as Pink and Coco. If you go on to any middle school campus in the United States today, you can find whatever drug you want. As drug use has increased so have the number of children overdosing on drugs. In the United States, approximately 125 kids overdose on drugs every day and the number is climbing.

In addition to these factors, gangs and crime among teenagers are on the rise. Why are they on the rise? The teens believe their fellow gang members will help protect them if someone tries to jump them. Since they have no faith in the government or the economy, the only way to get what you need is to steal it. According to the way many teens are starting to think. They see no problem in what they are doing because they feel they are just living by the rules that the adults have established.

This is no way for a child to grow up. They should not have to be afraid of being killed because of their religion, race or sexual orientation. The feelings that I have described above cross all lines in our society. I have heard these feelings from white teens, African-American teens, Hispanic teens etc. I have also heard these feelings from teenagers whose families are very well to do and those that are homeless.

I am not only hear teenagers expressing their concerns in my office, we are now seeing teenagers expressing their concerns publicly. Since the shooting in Parkland, Florida, teenagers have been appearing on television news shows and holding rallies demanding that our Government change gun laws so they may feel safer going to school. With the 3 mass shootings in less than a week, teenagers are asking again for sane gun laws, so they can go to school and not be afraid of being killed. However, teenagers are seeing the Government doing nothing and playing politics. When teenagers in our country are banning together to tell us how afraid they are about today’s world, we need to listen.

Dr. Michael Rubino is an expert at treating teenagers and children. He has been treating teens and children for over 20 years for more information about his work or private practice visit his website at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or follow him on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Facts About Teenagers and Underground Parties

Facts About Teenagers and Underground Parties

Many of people still remember and are grieving over the terrible fire in the Oakland Warehouse which resulted in a tragic loss of many lives. Many young lives were lost needlessly and many families and friends are still grieving because they lost a loved one. Unfortunately, this was a tragedy waiting to happen and it could happen again.

Summer is coming to an end and many teens are thinking about having to start high school soon. Others will be starting college so they are thinking about their upcoming move and not be able to spend as much time with their high school friends. Therefore, as summer comes to an end many teens are thinking about being able to spend as much time as possible with their friends handing out, going to parties and having a good time. Some of these parties they will be planning to attend are referred to as “underground parties.” Such as the one in the Oakland warehouse where so many people died in the tragic fire.

These “underground parties” are very common with teenagers and college students. The place of the parties are usually is posted the day before the party on Facebook or other social media sites that teenagers use. Typically these parties occur in warehouses in Oakland and San Francisco. The party organizers do not get permits nor do they consider safety. Typically at these parties there is a lot of alcohol and drugs such as ecstasy, pink, spice, wax, heroin etc. Therefore, the party organizers are looking for out of the way locations were they are unlikely to be detected by the police.

Many teenagers view these parties as fun because of the dancing and because typically these parties start late at night and go until 3 or 4 o’clock in the morning. Also since it is underground, if they want to drink or use any of the drugs they can. All they need is the money to buy it or a friend who is willing to buy it and no one will stop them.

Typically a teen will be looking on social media to find the underground parties for the weekend. Often while online they meet other people who are going and they often make plans to go with someone they just met online. Since the parties start usually after 10pm many parents don’t know if their teenager is going to an underground party or not. The teen usually says they are spending the night at a friends house and they sneak out of the friends house to go to the party.

I have had many teenagers tell me about these parties. When I point out the risk such as they don’t know anything about who set it up, the safety of the area or the people who will be there, they also have no idea about the people just met online. They have a tendency to say I’m over reacting or being too careful. I also mention they are taking a tremendous risk going to these parties a drinking anything or using any drugs. Again they have no idea what they are drinking or taking and how their body will respond to the substances. Again, teenagers tend to say that I am overly concerned and there is nothing to worry about because they have gone to these parties before and they know how to handle it.

However, the fire that occurred in the Oakland warehouse shows there is something to worry about. The organizer had no concerns about safety nor did he take responsibility for the fire and what happened. Furthermore, since it was done secretly no one knew for a long time who was there and if they were safe or not. Facebook posted a page for people to check in as safe. However, that didn’t help the families who were waiting to hear, if a loved one was safe or not.

Parents this time of the summer is an excellent time to sit down with your teenager and talk about these “underground parties.” Teenagers have a lot of free time during the summer and they feel entitled to be able to party because they will school is starting soon and some of their friends are leaving for college. Therefore, since they have a short amount of time to be together with all their friends, they also have a right to party and have a good time. Discuss the dangers associated with these parties. Teenagers may argue about the fact that these parties are safe, but point to the Oakland party as an example that these parties are not always safe. Discuss with your teen other places they can go with their friends to have a good time without taking such a big risk.

Parents we also need to put pressure on the authorities to hold the owner of these warehouses and party organizers responsible for what happens at these parties. The Oakland fire was a horrific event. In addition to the building may not be safe, many kids overdose at these parties. Many of these teens die because no one wants to call the police or everyone is so busy dancing and using that they don’t notice if someone has overdosed. Again, the organizer is never held responsible.

One last point, parents when you discuss the “underground parties” with your teenagers use the Oakland fire as proof that bad things can and do happen to teenagers. Many teenagers feel safe taking chances with their lives because they don’t believe anything will happen to them. The tragedy in Oakland proves something can happen.

Dr. Michael Rubino has over 20 years experience working with teenagers and learning about their online activities. For more information about his work or private practice visit his website at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com or his Facebook page at http://www.Facebook.com/drrubino3.

Helping Teens Start High School in 2019

Helping Teens Start High School in 2019

In about six weeks a number of students will be starting their first year in high school. Parents this is a good time to think back to your first day of high school and how you felt and what you were expecting. This can help you relate to some of the feelings your teenager is having and help you when you talk to them about starting high school. Hopefully this article will be able to provide some tips to make it an easy transition for your teenager and for you.

One common stressor for many teenagers are the stories they have heard about how seniors picking on and teasing the freshman students. Another common fear for freshman is that they are going to get lost on the campus and not be able to find their classrooms. Your teenagers are at a point in their life where they want to make a good impression on the other students. At their age image is very important. Therefore the idea of being teased by the seniors or getting lost on the campus can be very stressful and also create a great deal of anxiety for a student starting high school.

As parents, you can talk to your teenagers about your first days days at high school and reassure them that the stories they hear about Freshmen being targets for the seniors are greatly exaggerated. Also you can try to go with them over to the school before it starts and walk around the campus so they can get use to where everything is at their new school. Another thing you can do is remind them that everyone makes mistakes so if they do get lost the first day it is not a big deal. Remind them there will be a lot of other kids starting their first day of school too and there will be other kids getting lost. This is also another opportunity to continue to establish an open relationship with your teenager. The more you talk with each other, you increase the likelihood that they will feel comfortable coming and talking to you about issues they will have while in high school.

Another issue facing some students is starting all over. In middle school may be everyone knew them and they were in the “popular group.” Now no one knows them and they need to start all over. This may be frightening to them, but remind them there will be many times in life when they will need to start as the new person. Also remind them, if they were able to do it in middle school, they can do it in high school too. Be sure to encourage them to have faith in themselves because it won’t happen over night. Now for many students middle school was a nightmare. They may be looking forward to starting over. Again remind them if they have the desire to try they can do it. All the Freshmen are starting all over just like them, but also to be patient because it may not happen as quickly as they like.

Also before school actually starts is a very good time to establish what your expectations are regarding grades and after school activities and hanging out with friends. At this time is a good time to establish what your expectations are homework, after school jobs and weekend curfews. If you establish an understanding between yourself and your teenager before these situations arise you can save yourself a lot of time arguing with your teenager. However as you establish these guidelines you want to have a conversation with your teenager about these issues. Remember your teenager is starting to enter the adult world, if you simply just tell them these are the rules, they will feel that you are being unfair and they will try to find a way around your rules. If you have a discussion with them about the rules they will feel that their opinions were respected, they are more likely to feel that the rules are fair and are more likely to follow the rules. It is also a good idea to write a contract with all the things you agreed to. If you write the agreements down and there is a misunderstanding you simply need to refer back to the contract. Also this is another opportunity for you to establish a relationship with your teenager where they feel comfortable enough to come to you and discuss any problems they may be having. You are also role modeling to them how to have an adult discussion and how to negotiate fairly and respectfully with other their people.

Of course you also want to take this opportunity to discuss with your teenager the fact that they are going to be faced with making decisions about alcohol, drugs and sex. This is a good time to provide them with the education they will need in order to cope with these situations. It is even more important today because technology has changed a number of rules. For example, if a girl texts a nude photo to a boy, he is guilty of having child pornography. Yes it was mutually agreed to but they are still under 18 years old so it is a crime. Texting is another area where they can get into trouble. If someone takes a text as a threat they can get into trouble for bullying or assault. As I said, technology has changed the rules and many of us have not been able to keep it. Therefore, remind them that information they may receive from their friends may not always be accurate. Furthermore, encourage them that at any time if they have any questions or concerns regarding these matters or any other matters you are always there to listen and to talk with them.

One thing to remember is acronym HALT. I teach this often with anger management, but it helps with communication too.

H – hunger

A – anger

L – lonely

T – tired

If either one of you are having these feelings, it is generally not a good time to have a discussion. Also if either one of you is feeling like this and you may not be listening to each other. Therefore, if either one of you are having these feelings or don’t feel like talking, then it’s better to postpone the conversation until you are both ready to talk.

Lastly, remind them that they are starting a brand-new phase in their life and it is normal to feel anxious and stress. Also remind them that these feelings are normal in the beginning but they usually quickly disappear after they have started school.

Sadly, one other subject you may want to discuss is school shootings. Develop a plan with your teenager about what they would do if there was a shooting at their school. Also discuss with them what to do if they hear rumors or have concerns about how another student is acting. Finally, discuss how you can help if they are feeling worried or not safe at school. It is sad, but this is the world we live in today. Talking to you teen can help decrease anxiety and help you to maintain open communication with your teenager.

A few things you can do on the first day of classes to help with any anxiety are you can get up in the morning with them and have breakfast with them before they go to school. You can also put a note of encouragement in their backpack that they will find when they are at school and this can help reassure them and remind them how much support they have at home. Finally, you can arrange to be at home when when they get home from their first day of high school so you can talk about it with them. Also plan to have a family dinner to discuss everyone’s first day of school and offer encouragement where needed. These are just a few ideas to help with the transition process.

Dr. Michael Rubino is a psychotherapist who specializes in treating children and teenagers. He has over 20 years experience working with teenagers. To learn more about his private practice in Pleasant or the work he has done over 20 years visit his web site at http://www.RubinoCounseling.com.